Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Dos Blancos



I just read that the dos Blancos, Henry and Gregor, combined to go 6 for 9 for Team Venezuela against Team USA to help Venezuela win Pool C in first round of World Baseball Classic action. Although I'm disappointed by the loss from my country, I can't help but enjoy the drubbing delivered by the Blancos. To be honest though, I really only have sentiment for Henry Blanco but the story sounds better when its called The Dos Blancos due to the rhyming and how it probably makes you think about the movie The Three Amigos on some level. That movie does bring a smile to most everyone's face I would think, so I don't mind invoking it. You're welcome.

One might think The Two Blancos would be a more appropriate title for invoking The Three Amigos because the numbers are both in English. Maybe it would, but it's an awful title because it sounds stupid. I could have just gone all out and went with Los Dos Blancos but then OBVIOUSLY it wouldn't invoke The Three Amigos at all, but I guess the rhyming would have been nice. The bottom line is that The Dos Blancos is the title for this blog because of the importance of making my readers think about The Three Amigos.

Where was I?

The Dos Blancos took it to the US yesterday. Gregor was 3 for 5 including a triple and a double and one RBI. Henry was 3 for 4 with a solo homer and a double, good for two runs scored and one RBI. Henry also gunned down Derek Jeter trying to steal second base when the US was rallying with one out in the ninth, allowing K-Rod to end the rally by striking out Kevin Youkilis.

Henry Blanco is awesome. I would like to give evidence of this with a number of photos:


Here, Henry Blanco is tracking down a pop up. This picture shows a couple reasons why he's cool. He's got some tattoos that are rad and menacing. For exactly how manacing they are in real life I need to note an observation made by my friend Arden French. He noticed the Cubs had noticeably fewer bench-clearing brawls the last few years. After extensive research it was determined that the reason was Henry Blanco. Teams would often times start to climb the steps to brawl. Yet upon noticing Blanco coming up the steps for the Cubs they would suddenly freeze in their steps. Most times they decided instead just to shout angrily from their dugout instead of brawling. It's no coincidence, you can do the research yourself. I think it's safe to say the Cubs will sorely miss Blanco.

Also, he uses and old fashioned catcher's mask that has the helmet separate from the mask. I think that's so he can have a helmet on for plays at the plate, just in case some rough-housing ensues.

Plays at the plate? YES. Awesome ones. Heres a few:

















Mmmmm nice try Brewers-guy. You gave it a good shot, but that is Henry Blanco and you're out!


and...



















I'm pretty sure that right after this photo was taken Jorge Posada turned around and started running back toward third base. Also, look at the guy whose supposed to be telling Posada whether to slide or not. He's not doing anything! He's scared shitless! He's just like so glad it's Posada in that situation and not him Out.


and finally, this one.




















Now, in this one Blanco does not have the ball as you can see it rolling away. However, I don't think that Mets player is going to be okay. I'm not sure where his head is and one of his legs is bent all weird. And why is there a bat just flying through the air? Did Blanco use that on this hapless Met? Safe...but injured for life.


As a side note, look how lame Mets fans are. That's a play at the plate and they're in the front few rows behind home plate and they're just sitting there. I mean, where I'm from I stand up when one of my teams players is racing toward the plate and a close play is about to ensue. I can even see at least two people that look as if they're staring off toward center field or something. I just don't get it.


My apologies to Gregor Blanco. I couldn't find any cool pictures of you. Well, I didn't even try.